The School Run

Having vented my spleen on Nissan Micras and their incompetent owners (with the exception of Shirley). Some of the subsequent comments thew up a couple of other issues, the first is a loathing of people who have 4x4's for effect, and in particular the hideous and pointless Porsche Cayenne (above), but also their use by Mum's on the school run:

t put it like this:

'The worst case of cayennes congregating can be found by Colfes school in Lee with middle class, big-hair mums dropping off their dah-ling little Tristans. They can barely see over the bonnet let alone actually drive the things and beacause of this they block the road up something chronic. '

and Nigel put it thus:

'The school-run mums and others like 4x4s because they make them feel safer and give them a clearer view. So essentially we have some of the most timid, inexperienced, and unsafe drivers, driving around in the biggest and most dangerous vehicles. '

All of which got me thinking back to dim and distant past of my school days in the 70's. Going to Rockmount Junior school in Upper Norwood, out of a School of 360 pupils, only 1 got taken to school by car, and he got the piss taken out of him unmercilessly for being such a wuss. Nowadays either the kids seem to have gone feral by the age of 5 with no parental supervision or control whatsoever or they are so pampered and protected that they can't use a bus by themselveves at the age of 18.

The only way I managed to get a lift to school was to walk out in front of a car and get my ankle smashed to pieces, and even then it was only while the plaster was up to the top of my thigh, as soon as it went below the Knee, that was it, back on the Bus (and my Mum had her own car and didn't work). The other time was my 3rd year at secondary School when I managed to persuade my German teacher Mrs Beric to pick me up, which at least kept me up with all the gossip about who was shagging who on the staff.

ROAD SAFETY & RELIEVING CONGESTION

Got a suggestion to make our roads safer, less congested and faster, that is to confiscate and crush all Nissan Micra's and rescind the driving licences of all those who drive them.
I would suggest a start could be made with the particularly ridiculous Mk 2 'noddy’ car version (see above).

This would have massive benefits in relieving Traffic congestion as there would be far less driving on the outside lane of dual carriageways, just below the speed limit, without overtaking anything, there would be far less gaps in the traffic by people failing to keep up with the car in front and many more cars would be able to get through traffic lights when they are green, thus optimising the use of precious road space. Far fewer cars would be failing to drive through gaps big enough for a London Bus to go through sideways and you wouldn’t have to wait for the moron Micra driver in front of you trying to turn right, but needing the road clear for 2 miles in each direction before they turn out, thus speeding up the flow of traffic. Finally otherwise law abiding motorists will have far less chance of being driven to the edge of insanity by the Micra menace and will not feel the need to execute reckless manoeuvres in order to get past.

What is the problem with these people, is it that they learnt to drive in a Micra (seem to be the most popular driving school vehicle) and they are such poor drivers that they can’t think of using anything else? Whatever it is just get them off the roads NOW!